Monday, December 28, 2009

Let's try this again...

It's been awhile, hasn't it?  I've done a lot of thinking about this blog thing, and I am praying that God uses it for good, for His glory, and to share what He's doing in my life and the lives of those around me.  So it's not private anymore.  I'm trusting God to use this for His purposes, not mine.
All that being said, I was re-reading something I wrote in August, after arriving home from a summer in Haiti.  I am always thinking and planning for the next time I'll return, and this morning as I sat and read the brochure I had created, I was struck again by the passion and love that oozes from my words.  When I speak or write about those precious children, and speak of what God is doing in the lives of the teachers, staff, and children at the O, I am reminded of the fullness of God's joy in my life.  I allow myself to be distracted by things or situations that attempt to rob me of that joy.  At times, I think I've lost that joy completely.  But this joy is not a feeling.  It is not something that is circumstantial.  It is something that can only come from living in the fullness of God's grace.  Joy is what happens when we are obedient to God's design and calling on our lives.  Joy and peace go hand in hand, and along with it is love.  Not a coincidence that we've been learning more about that the last few weeks at church.  They are not external things, they cannot be increased or decreased by external things either.  If you are loving others as God loves you (exceedingly difficult, given I am human, and God being God, and being love Himself has a leg up on me...) then you are experiencing the fullness of His joy.  When you are loving others, and filled with joy, you have a peace inside that cannot be explained.  Peace that regardless of the externals (money, home, job, food, relationships, whatever) God has a plan for you, has a plan for your life, a plan that will bring Him glory beyond anything we can ever begin to imagine. 
I want to be back in that fullness of peace, love, and joy.  I've allowed externals to get in the way...silly busy-ness, work, my attitude about work, you name it, and I've let it slowly get in the way. 
When I read my words earlier, I was reminded of what God has for me right now.  That He's using me.  That I have to stay open and ready, and focused on Him.  I desperately want to be obedient to what God is asking of me, what He needs me to do.  When I stay focused on that, then I am able to experience the joy of serving Creator God, the fullness of His love for me sent in His son, Jesus, and the peace that His Holy Spirit fills me with.
Hallelujah!

No comments: